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Sunday, November 28, 2004
No Quick Marriages for For Our Troops
Yesterday, I got an mail from a Southern California Minister that can issue marriage licenses and performs marriages "in less than an hour, and maybe over the telephone". I must admit that it sets me back somewhat. I recall WWII stories of women marrying up to a dozen men headed for combat in order of collect the government stipend and settlement for those killed in combat. The men that lived would return, and would not be able to find their brides. So, in their minds, the returning vets would be married and ultimately be required to divorce their "wife", in order to enter into a subsequent marriage.
Below my signature is my answer to the Minister. I hope that young men and women contemplating a quick marriage will read this, and heed my reply which is the most sincere advice that I have ever offered. I am confident that your CO's and NCO's would agree with the advice.
Please remember that the three most important things in one's life are their birth, their marriage, and their death. We do not have any control of the first and the last. Hence, making a decision to wed is the most important decision that one will ever make.
Sincerely, Gunner
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On a personal level, I cannot support your efforts to marry young men and women in the last days before, and in particular after deployment. Such an effort most certainly cannot allow time for conventional counseling by clergy prior to the marriage. My observations indicate that marriages performed at this time in ones life are not necessarily founded on a good foundation. Young men and women are very vulnerable at this time in their life, as apprehension and loneliness grips them in the final days before and after they deploy to "a combat zone." To marry in such an emotional state is not advisable.
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